Me: Shoes that look this good are too painful to wear by the end of the night.
Russian lover: That's OK.
Me: What do you mean, "That's OK"? Don't you care that my feet will be hurting?
Russian lover: I do care, but they won't be hurting.
Me: Why not?
Russian lover: Because by the end of the night you won't be on your feet; you'll be on your back.