So far it looks like 2012 is the Year of the Divorce. Not a whole lot of knot-tying going on, but amicable separations? You can't refresh your browser as fast as these are being announced right now. The year's most popular resolution: Getting the hell out of this relationship.
The past weekend brought us the demise of yet another obnoxiously perfect union, Heidi and Seal. The annual renewal of vows! The blow-out Halloween party tradition! Those perfect bodies, those A-list careers! Why, if these kids can't make it work then obviously the rest of us don't have a chance.
It used to be that the more money and social status you had, the less freedom you were allowed in your romantic choices. Romance was for stable boys and scullery maids! Anyone of wealth and social standing understood that their role in life was to preserve the status quo at a minimum, but preferably to elevate the social rank and material assets of the whole family. Marriage was no more romantic then than a corporate merger is today. Marriage, in fact, was the original corporate merger. The many left-leaning ladies upset about the existence of corporate personhood might pause a moment to be glad at least that they've been relieved of that particular responsibility.
But today it's precisely the rich and famous that marry with impunity, without thought to the implications of their union or the consequences of a subsequent separation. Beyond a prenup, anyway. The rest of the population has to give serious consideration to the outcome of throwing fates together. When wealth marries it boards a yacht together; when mediocrity weds it is climbing with each other into a life raft.
But these celebrity marriages fail for the same reason reality dating shows never lead to lasting relationships; they're built on nothing but a set piece. When the show is done, when the lights dim, when the audience is gone -- they just pack it all up and call it over, only a little surprised that there was nothing left when the performances concluded.
A lot of people say that love, a marriage, is work-- and it's work that sometimes people grow tired of. I don't think that's true. I think love is what grows between two people who work together at life.